Interracial Love: More Than Just a Hashtag

If you’ve listened to our podcast, This Might Be a Bad Idea, you already know we don’t do surface-level stories. We dig in. This blog expands on our latest episode, Why We Joke That Jeff Is a Racist | Interracial Love, Culture Shock & Starting Over in Mexico, which, spoiler, isn’t what it sounds like. It’s about humor, love, and learning to navigate the messy middle of an interracial marriage while building a life abroad.

When you’re moving to Mexico as a couple and figuring out marriage, identity, and expat life all at once, you either learn to laugh or you lose your mind. We chose laughter — and maybe a little tequila.

The Origin Story: A Swipe, a Starbucks, and a Running Joke

Like most modern “love stories,” ours started with a dating app and zero expectations. My first impression? He was cheap — Starbucks for a first date? But four hours later, I was laughing harder than I had in years.

That $2.50 coffee turned into a running joke that followed us everywhere — one that became our inside language for surviving awkward stares, assumptions, and all the “are you two really together?” moments. The joke in our episode title came from real situations where people didn’t quite know what to make of us. Instead of getting defensive, we laughed. Humor became our way to soften the sharp edges of ignorance.

Navigating Culture Shock in Mérida as an Interracial Couple

Fast forward a few years — we sold almost everything, packed six suitcases and a cat, and landed in Mérida, Mexico. Cue the culture shock.

As an interracial couple, everything felt amplified: the language barriers, the stares, the curiosity. We weren’t just Americans — we were different. I was often mistaken for local, Jeff wasn’t, and it came with some strange looks and awkward assumptions. We learned early that patience (and Google Translate) were going to be key.

We leaned on each other constantly. When one of us was frustrated, the other found humor in the situation. That became our survival skill — the ability to laugh with each other instead of turning against each other.

Humor as a Survival Mechanism: Love, Loss, and Life Abroad

When you live abroad, humor becomes oxygen. Between bureaucracy, language fails, and the occasional power outage during dinner, laughing is the only sane response.

After losing my brother and leaving my home city, humor became how I processed grief. For Jeff, it became a bridge — his way of connecting when words didn’t translate. Together, humor became how we survived and how we stayed close. Because honestly, if you can laugh in the middle of a meltdown, you’re probably doing okay.

Communication: The Real Glue

People always ask how we “make it work.” The answer? We talk. Constantly. About the big things — race, identity, belonging — and the small things, like how he loads the dishwasher wrong.

Open communication has been the secret sauce of our marriage. We talk through misunderstandings before they turn into resentment. We create space for hard conversations, especially around our experiences with race. That kind of honesty builds trust — and without it, we wouldn’t have made it through the move, the culture shock, or each other’s sarcasm.

Life in Mérida: The Good, The Hard, and The Beautiful

Mérida has been both kind and challenging. The people here are warm and generous — I once left my phone in the airport bathroom and got it back ten minutes later. (That would never happen in Philly.)

But being expats comes with loneliness too. We miss family, the ease of familiarity, and understanding every sign we see. We’ve built a community here, though — locals and other expats who get it — and that has made all the difference.

Family, Perception & Finding Our Own Definition of Home

Every interracial couple has their version of “the talk” — the one where you realize not everyone will understand your relationship. We’ve faced disapproving relatives, curious strangers, and well-meaning but awkward questions.

But love changes things. Over time, people who doubted us started to see that what we have isn’t about color, it’s about character. Family dynamics take time, but respect grows when you lead with love and consistency.

The Bigger Picture: Interracial Love Is Real Life, Not a Hashtag

Our story isn’t a headline or a trend — it’s just us. Real people figuring out life, love, and home in a country that’s taught us more about kindness and perspective than we could have imagined.

Interracial love is messy, hilarious, healing, and complicated. But it’s also beautiful. It forces you to grow, to see the world through someone else’s eyes, and to keep choosing each other — especially when it’s hard.

If there’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s this: love really doesn’t care about borders, backgrounds, or the opinions of strangers. And honestly, that’s the best kind of bad idea we’ve ever had.

Listen to the Episode

Why We Joke That Jeff Is a Racist | Interracial Love, Culture Shock & Starting Over in Mexico